The close emotional relationship that begins at birth does not end with it, on the contrary. It is built with a path that continues for a long time on a biological and emotional level. Attachment, therefore, can equally be created even with non-biological, adoptive or foster parents.
Adopted children generally need time: the innate sense of security, which instinctively binds a child to their parent, has been violated by abandonment, so there is a need for sweetness, time and gradualness. A new relationship of trust must be built. Gail Steinberg, who has addressed the topic of adoption-attachment in more than one text, expresses all this very well: “Take time to get to know each other. There's no rush. Take time to look at each other, touch each other, laugh, play, and have fun together. You and your baby will have a lifetime to continue to deepen your attachment."
It is a beautiful journey that begins from the first meeting and, nourished by love, continues throughout life; contact, hugging, sending messages of love and willingness to listen strengthen this new bond day by day.
Massage and babywearing are excellent vehicles: they can be of great help.
Testimony from a mother:
"Having adopted my princess when she was 20 days old, Mei Tai was a great help for all three of us...We established physical contact with her. Especially in the early days I felt like she was "in my belly", the I viscerally stopped all my love and learned to feel it as mine. And my husband also consolidated it
a lot of bonding with her in this way.
In particular, it was she who felt cared for, loved, protected always close to us; and even though she was adopted she is a calm, smiling, serene little girl, she cries very little, she hasn't had colic and she sleeps all night."